Keep listening. Don’t fill the space; just let them talk.
“I’m so sorry you experienced that.”
“This is not your fault.”
“Wow. That must have been _______” (hurtful, scary, so sad…)
“It takes courage to share that kind of experience.”
“I’m here for you.”
“It’s hard to understand why things like this happen and still believe God loves you. But He does love you. He is with us in the sadness and hard times, too.”
“I’m so thankful you shared this with me. Who is helping you talk about these difficult experiences?”
Resources
Practical Resources for Parents and Leaders
Sometimes the most challenging thing is to practically implement information like this in your ministry. We pray these resources allow you to be the loving, caring adult hurting children desperately need.
8 Ways to Respond to A Child When They Talk About Trauma
Prayer Card
Stop and print this prayer card. Use it in your own personal time with the Lord. Keep it in your Bible for those times of overwhelming grief as you think about the weight so many children carry. As you pray, read the passages of Scripture and ask our Father to help you sit in this suffering with His children.
Trauma Prayer Card
15 Ways to Create a Safe Environment for Kids in Your Children's Ministry
Trauma-Informed Children’s Ministry outlines four environmental conditions that support kids:
A sense of
1) safety
2) regulation
3) connection and
4) value.
All four of these conditions fit within our 3B ministry philosophy, helping foster a sense of belonging.
Here’s a printable of 15 practical ways to create those conditions in your ministry and in your church.
Fifteen Ways to Create a Safe Environment
Navigating Pain and Suffering Family Conversation Guide
We know that in this fallen world, bad things happen to good people, even to children, the most vulnerable and precious among us. While we do not understand why children experience horrific acts, our desire is to partner with you to equip parents. This “Why does God let bad things happen?” can be shared with parents to equip them to talk about tough topics in an age-appropriate way.
Navigating Pain and Suffering Family Conversation Guide
Equip Your Team: Reach Hurting Kids Workshop
You want to equip your team to reach hurting kids. Unfortunately, you don’t know how to train them yourself, and you don’t have enough money to hire a professional. Reach Hurting Kids Workshop, is an engaging, evidence-based curriculum that allows you to teach your own team the principles of trauma-informed children’s ministry.
Use the coupon code “AWANA” to receive a 10% discount on all purchases through the end of 2023.
Read the Book: Trauma-Informed Children's Ministry
Trauma-Informed Children’s Ministry: A Practical Guide to Reaching Hurting Kids is the culmination of ten years of research in the field of children’s ministry science. Written by research psychologist Dr. Robert Crosby and play therapist Lori Crosby, this easy-to-read book is full of real-world stories and practical strategies for ministering to kids who have experienced trauma.
Read the Article: Discipling Children in Pain
When discipling children who have experienced trauma, our goal is that children will come to belong in our churches while being known in their pain, believe that God’s love for them is just the same as it has always been, and that they would become a resilient disciple who, like many of us, has scars that tell the story of Jesus’ redemptive love for them in the midst of their pain. Read the entire article here.
Resource Your Parents: Anxiety Guide
Equip parents to have conversations about anxiety with their children with our Anxiety Parent Guide.